Jen Sincero writes in her book You are a Badass about tips on how to be successful in life.
Comparing this book to Subtle art of Not Giving a F*ck, I would say that Badass has less actionable advice for the advanced personal developer. However Badass is still a great book for the beginner, and written by a woman it may have the ability to connect with other women looking to be inspired as Jen is a great role model. I also read Grant Cardone’s book The 10x Rule and found little actionable advice in it. Grant’s book seems to me to be more motivational – it reminded me of the drill sergeant that yells at the top of his lungs 1 inch from your face.
Our subconscious minds have been programmed from birth in an unfiltered way and this programming drives our daily lives including decision making and how we feel about ourselves. The author believes that we are oblivious to these subconscious beliefs and we let them run our lives. If we decide to engage our conscious mind, it must deal with all this prior programming. I particularly like this point, it’s one of the best in the book.
The author states that it’s important to be present in the moment. I totally agree.
The author spends a lot of time talking about “Source Energy” and “Frequency”, high frequency is good and low frequency is bad. I was disappointed with this part of the book. It reminds me a lot of The Secret. I don’t believe in the supernatural and I classify “Frequency” and “Energy” as a New-Age hippy dippy thing that doesn’t have any science backing it up.
What I disliked about The Secret is how you wish into the universe and the universe can hear you like some sentient being, and responds to fulfill your wishes. This to me is like a religion and is not founded in evidence-based scientific principals. However I believe that part of The Secret does have validity – If one believes strongly in something and take action towards that goal, the belief can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. The person putting their idea out into the universe assumes an identity. It has been proven that assuming an identity helps to bring to fruition a goal. Also being mindful about a goal sets into motion the thought processes requires to manifest the plan into a reality. This is part of the required strategy. The other part is utilizing techniques that execute the goals and keep them consistent, (which is content for another podcast).
The author told a story of traveling to India and taking a bus ride between cities. A ride that should have taken a couple hours ended up taking 3 times longer because of diversions to religious temples and talk of weddings – apparently the author inadvertently picked the peak wedding season to travel. What I got out of this story is to be open minded and flexible/adaptable. In your journey you may encounter unexpected things, and those things may be beneficial. I appreciated the point because I am a planner and get anxiety when unexpected things happen.
The author invents a lot of her own terminology, I will try to use the common definitions I have seen other authors use.
Ego, Big Snooze, shadow self, false self – fear based, external locus of control, self-sabotaging, relies on limiting beliefs, scarcity mindset
True/Higher self, “Superhero” – proactive, internal locus of control, operates with abundance mindset, “loved-based”
The author uses “have faith” a lot. However there isn’t a lot of technique backing this claim. Maybe she means exercise GRIT and persevere through THE DIP.
The author states many times in the book to “love yourself”. At one point she lists some techniques in doing so:
Appreciate how special you are
Drown yourself in affirmations
Do things you love
Ditch self-deprecating humour
Let the love in
Don’t compare yourself to others
These things can be easier said than done. A bad relationship with a parent can set one down a path of failing to achieve many of these items. Each of these can be its own book. That’s OK, sometimes a book acts as a road sign to which book needs to be read next.
Don’t care what others think.
Just do it (like Michael Jordan)
Then there’s super valuable advice like listen to your intuition, follow your fantasies, and (again) love yourself.
Meditate, it helps.
“Your brain is your bitch” positive thinking, know the what and figure out the how later. The what vs. how thing got me thinking about Simon Sinek’s know your Why.
Our thoughts are the most powerful tools we have.
Positive karma, do good and you will get good.
Gratitude – I’ve covered this often on the podcast.
Forgive others and set yourself free. You forgive for you.
Your experience shapes your perceived reality. This sounds a lot like NLP’s the map is not the territory.
Ditch negative self doubt. Don’t procrastinate, it’s self sabotage. Stop making excuses.
Stop feeling fear.
We attract people who we think are like us, and these people are mirrors. Sounds a lot like you are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.
Make the decision and commit.
Money is your friend. The author spends a lot of time talking about the guilt of becoming rich. And that you should spend money to get money. I can see this if you need to use your personal savings to buy capital needed for making a product, etc. However the author used the example of buying a very expensive Audi SUV in order to feel important, and set her mind towards being someone worthy of spending money and therefore making money. I don’t agree with this. That’s a risky way to self-motivate and I can think of many other methods that don’t put yourself into debt just when you can least afford it. Maybe the author was implying a “burning the bridges” strategy where if you incur debt then you force yourself to find a way to earn the money to pay the bills?
The author talks about Surrender vs. Resistance and how faith in the universe must be stronger than fear of not getting what you want. This is more new age anti-science in my opinion. She wants us to “allow the universe to deliver” the solution to us rather than us “trying to change the situation”. Wow. I must disagree here. I would much rather use the rip current analogy here. If you are fighting against a force you can’t overcome, swim perpendicular to the rip current. Use strategies that are like Judo, leveraging the situation in your favor. This often requires a pivot to your current strategy. But the whole time you are in control of your actions and you rely on sound scientific methods to execute a successful plan.
Finish what you start. The author encourages the reader to get in the habit of following through on commitments. If not, then it sets a bad precedence, like how most people don’t finish a course or seminar that they sign up for – like dropping out of college.